Waving goodbye. Waving goodbye. Waving goodbye.

 

 

Linkspage

On this page are links to online sites with information on family estrangement and issues related to estrangement.
Also a list of celebrities and others who have been in the news and who have experienced family estrangement.
The link to Alice Walker's "Taking Care of the Truth: Embedded Slander: A Meditation on the Complicity of Wikipedia" is the most recent addition in the list of those "Estranged & in the News".

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  • Support Groups
  • Articles
  • Mental Health Issues
  • Estranged & In the News

Online Support Groups

Note: Be aware that there is a chance that someone whom you didn't intend to see your posts may find them, even years after you wrote them. It is advisable to take precautions to protect your identity. You might not think so now but you may regret your lack of caution in the future. It doesn't hurt to post anonymously under an alias.

  • Dr. Joshua Coleman's Discussion Forums:

    "When Parents Hurt". This forum for parents estranged by their adult children began in December 2006 in connection with Dr. Coleman's book When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along.

    Estranged from My Parents. This forum is for adult children who are estranged from their parents.

  • Estranged Stories: An online support group on Ning for those who are experiencing family estrangement. Membership in this group now tops 3,000. It is principally for parents are experiencing estrangements from their adult children.

  • Parents of Estranged Adult Children Everywhere: Online support group on the Daily Strength website.

    From the front page of the group on dailystrength.org: "Do you have adult children, who have blamed you for everything wrong in their childhood, lost contact either through addiction, divorce, or in laws? No phone calls for birthdays, Mother's day, just no communication. How do you cope with the emptiness, the painful loss of not having your children in your life?"

  • Parents Who Walk Away: Online support group on the Daily Strength website. From the main page of the group on dailystrength.org: "A group for parents of estranged adult children who are tired of waiting for them to grow up/get real. Comprised of strong, wise survivors, this group is made up of parent who either have walked away or are considering walking away from the disrespectful actions of their abusive adult children. Straight talk, tough stances and the free exchange of ideas/opinions can be found here. Everyone is Welcome!"

  • Christian Parents of Estranged Adult Children: Online support group on the Daily Strength website that discusses estrangement from a Christian perspective. From the main page of the group on daily strength.org: "Estrangement makes it difficult to talk about with family, friends, neighbors and church members. Christians are NOT immune to broken families. Talk about your experiences with those who know how you feel and get positive support through your Christian faith."

  • BPD Central Randi Kreger, author, advocate, and owner of BPDCentral.com, established Welcome to Oz in 1996 to enable family members with a borderline or narcissistic loved one to support each other and share tips and techniques.

  • Out of the Fog Forum. Out of the FOG was launched on November 1 2007 to provide information and support to the family members and loved-ones of individuals who suffer from a personality disorder. FOG stands for Fear, Obligation and Guilt.

  • Narcissistic Personality Disorder Forum on PsychForums.com

  • Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents: A discussion group on Yahoo. The group is restricted and self moderated. It is "intended to be a nurturing place for learning, validation, and thoughtful discussion."

Offline Support Groups

  • Parents of Estranged Children: Community Support Group. Meetings to be held beginning June 3, 2008 on Tuesdays from from 6:30 to 8 pm, at the Starting Point in Westmont, NJ at 215 Highland Avenue, Suite C. Note: An email address (poec_group@live.com) for information was provided to me several years ago. It is unknown if this group is active or not. I sent an inquiry to this email address years ago and received no response.

  • Healing Estranged Relationships: H.E.R., a nonprofit organization in Dallas, Texas which offers in person live discussion groups for women who are experiencing estrangement. There are plans to expand this group to other locations and also have a group for men.

  • National Alliance on Mental Illness, NAMI: The nation’s largest grassroots organization for people with mental illness and their families. Founded in 1979, NAMI has affiliates in every state and in more than 1,100 local communities across the country. Meetings are available in some cities.

Blogs of Authors & Organizations

E-stranged, the blog of Fiona McColl, Australian writer, poet, photographer, and social worker. On her blog she says:

"My name is Fiona McColl and I am a clinical therapist, social worker, poet, photographer, researcher and activist for social change. I am also a women who is estranged from my family. I am currently undertaking research for a book about family estrangement. I am most interested in the experiences of people who are living with the complex realities of estrangement. If you would like to learn more or be involved with the E-stranged project through completing the pilot survey or sharing your story, please email me, Fiona McColl at: e-stranged@live.com."

The End of Strife: One woman's experience of high-conflict divorce and parental alienation: a blog about a bitter divorce and its effect on the relationships between a woman and her children. The blog has not been updated since June 2006.

False Memory Syndrome Foundation Website False memories have caused many cruel unjust estrangements.

A blog: Jan. 3, 2005: My Father didn't Call. A woman who has a father who it seems never failed to disappoint.

Former Things The blog of Gail Lowe, author of the novel, Former Things, a novel about a mother/daughter estrangement that spans twenty years. Gail has experienced estrangement in her own family and writes from the heart. She is a staff reporter for the Wakefield Daily Item and Melrose Weekly News in Massachusetts where she writes a column called Reflections from the Lowe Zone. She is also the owner of WordPower, a boutique company offering public relations, marketing and promotional services to the travel and tourism industry. In 2003, she founded Red Rock Writers, a creative writing collaborative. She also teaches writing at colleges in the Greater Boston area.

Interesting thread on an art discussion board about a painting that an artist did of his father from whom he is estranged.

Heal and Forgive, author Nancy Richards' blog. Nancy posts about abuse, estrangement, forgiveness, reconciliation, and related issues. Nancy is the author of Heal & Forgive: Forgiveness in the Face of Abuse and Heal and Forgive II: The Journey from Abuse and Estrangement to Reconciliation.

Motherless Homepage A website that offers support to those who have lost their mother. Has links to discussion groups including Motherless3, a Yahoo! group for those who have lost their mother through abandonment, estrangement or other issues. I have no information on these groups. If anyone has any experience with them that they would like to share with me and that I could include on this page, please send me an email.

Twinless Twins A website which offers support resources for twins who have lost their twin through separation, estrangement or death.

Wisdom Circle: Discussion Groups for Grandparents on the AARP website.

Articles

  1. Grief Articles index A page of articles connected to The Grief Recovery Handbook: The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death, Divorce, and Other Losses by John W. James and Russell Friedman, Harper Perennial, 1998. The book discusses the importance of dealing with grief. A workshop format is used.

  2. Cults, Estrangements, and Gaming. Jan. 8, 2002. An article, Cults by Bryan Jonker, and below the article are some links about cults. There is some interesting discussion on cults and how they work. I am not clear on how this relates to gaming (and realize that gaming is not the interest of most who are interested in these links) but thought the discussion sounded good enough to include the link here.

  3. Kat Giantis online article on mother daughter estrangements that are blamed on the mothers' unacceptable behavior.

  4. Truth and Reconciliation by Julia Gracen. May 22, 2002. Article about Laura Davis's book, I Thought We'd Never Speak Again which is referenced on the Books page.

  5. Mark Sichel's Psybersquares site. Articles on family estrangements

  6. Before the Sun goes Down, A Christian Biblical perspective: "Estrangements between friends should not be permitted to continue over night. It is a scriptural counsel that we should not let the sun go down upon our wrath."

  7. About Goans & Family Feuds, Family Feuds by Ema Souza Colaco - By Ben Antao & Aloysius D'Souza

  8. I want vengeance on my narcissistic mother: She didn't pull the trigger, but I blame her for my brother's suicide. On Salon.com. A question posted on an advice column, October 6, 2005, by Cary Tennis on Salon.com. You may need to watch a brief advertisement to read the article unless you are registered already on Salon.com.

  9. The Power of Forgiveness by Naomi Drew M.A.

  10. Forgiveness: The Mandela Principle by Rev. Victor H. Carpenter

  11. Learning to Forgive For Good. The website of Fred Luskin.

  12. Letting Go of Our Adult Children by Arlene F. Harder, M.A., M.F.T.

  13. It’s Never Too Late To Have A Good Relationship With Your Grown Children (Your Parents or Your Ex-Spouse, Too) by Suzanne E. Harrill

  14. A Gift for My Daughter by Harry Browne

  15. Borderline Rage, an article by Anthony Walker, M.D.

  16. The Stockholm Syndrome: The Mystery of Loving an Abuser.

  17. I won't be home for Christmas. Article on samesame.com about the stresses of being gay and lesbian and relating or not relating to family on the holidays.

  18. Grandparents' Rights Article An article on guidelines for grandparents who want visitation rights.

Estrangement Quotes

The Samuel Johnson Sound Bite Page: Estrangement A page of quotes by Samuel Johnson that all relate to the condition of Estrangement.

Organizations

National Institute of Mental Health, NIMH: the largest scientific organization in the world dedicated to research focused on the understanding, treatment, and prevention of mental disorders and the promotion of mental health.

Disorders that can be catalysts for estrangement

Note: My listing of a link does NOT mean that I agree with the information and opinions found at each site or that any of these sites will be helpful to anyone. I am not a mental health professional nor an expert on any of the conditions or situations mentioned below.

Asperger's Syndrome

Asperger's Syndrome, Asperger's Disorder or AS is an autism spectrum disorder. I heard of Asperger's for the first time that I can recall in 2007. I have read only a little bit about it. Some adults with AS have been in the news recently, having learned for the first time that they have Aspergers. These are people who are married with kids and professions and the whole nine yards. As I read about AS, I'm thinking of people I know who have some eccentric behaviors and histories. I have been wondering whether . . . ? The big "hmmmmmmmmmmmm?" My father-in-law perhaps?

You'd have to go some distance to find a more reserved person than him! Yet in his profession he was brilliant. Reserved, withdrawn, quiet and smart. Also odd and also estranged from his parents and siblings at his choice. One of the symptoms is social awkwardness and a lack of empathy.

Do you know someone who is reserved? Socially awkward but smart? Clumsy? With poor handwriting? Are you estranged from them? Are they you?

Your Child's Disorder May be Yours, Too by Benedict Carey, Dec. 9, 2007, NY Times. (May require registration to read article but registration should be free.) Fascinating article! Worth the trouble of registering if registering is required.

From Page 2 of the NY Times article:

"John Halpern, 76, a retired physicist living in Massachusetts, began to review his own life not long after hearing a radio interview with an expert on Asperger’s syndrome. He immediately recognized himself as a textbook case, he said, and decided to call his daughter, whom he hadn’t spoken to in 10 years. He wanted to apologize, he said, “for my inadequacy as both a father and a husband to her mother.”

But as soon as he started explaining, he said, his daughter cut him off. “That’s Asperger’s,” she told him. “She knew,” he said. “She had been looking into it herself, wondering if in fact I had it.”

Mr. Halpern said that over several calls they shared feelings and agreed “to work on our new relationship and see how far we can take it.” The two now talk regularly, at least once a week, he said."

Wikipedia article on Asperger Syndrome

Autism, Asperger's Syndrome, and the Autism Spectrum on aspergerssyndrome.org

O.A.S.I.S.: Online Asperger Syndrome Information and Support

Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger's by John Elder Robison. This is not about estrangement as far as I know but it is about having Asperger's Syndrome and being diagnosed with it relatively late in life. Robison is the brother of Augusten Burroughs who is the author of Running with Scissors: A Memoir, an account of his dysfunctional family. Burroughs' book was made into a movie.

Google Search Results on the words: asperger's syndrome.

Mood Disorders

Bipolar Disorder

This disorder can result in impulsive decisions and behavior, extreme irritability, and paranoia. There is a high risk of suicide in people who have this disorder due to the impulsivity and the despair when a sufferer has a recurrence of depression. It is the kind of disorder where people act before they think.

Information on Bipolar disorder at the National Institute of Mental Health

Bipolar Disorder on Psych Central.

Catching a Darkness: Glimpses of my Sister's Mania. Catching a Darkenss is Boris Dolin's online memorial in photographs and words to Jessica Dolin, his sister, who committed suicide in 2003. The site offers an intimate window on the interior life of a young woman with bipolar disorder and her family's attempts to help her despite her frequent rejections of assistance and her inability to see them as being helpful when she was in the depths of her illness.In 2002 she wrote The Holy Book of Illusion: A Journey Through Mania which was her account of what it feels like to suffer from bipolar disorder.

Recovery Through Art: The website of Mara McWilliams. From the home page of her site: "Mara is in recovery with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder, panic disorder, and anorexia. Mara's ultimate goal is to educate our society that through proper diagnosis, treatment, therapy, love, support, and understanding, recovery is possible."
Mara is an advocate for recovery through involvement in the arts, particularly through visual arts and poetry. Two of her poems are included on the Poetry Page.

Margaret Trudeau's recent diagnosis with bipolar disorder and longterm struggle with mental illness is described in this online article: "Margaret Trudeau: Quitting pot eased mental illness," Feb. 13, 2007, National Post.
From the article: "It is not uncommon for sufferers to self-medicate with alcohol or marijuana, she said, rather than reach out to family and friends or seek medical assistance."

Pendulum Resourses: Bipolar Disorder news, information, and support.

Surviving and Thriving with a Dual Diagnosis, by Lindy Fox. The link to article has become inactive since I first found it online. It might be worth searching for if you are interested. The article was her personal account of experiencing both bipolar disorder and alcoholism that resulted in many years of torment and struggle for her and her family. She has worked on research on dually diagnosed people like herself at the Dartmouth Psychiatric Research Center in New Hampshire.

Delusional Disorder. Persecutory Type, previously called Paranoid Disorder. May be one of the symptoms of Bipolar Disorder.

Depression

Depression can be triggered by any kind of loss including the loss of someone through estrangement. Depression can also be a factor in causing a person to isolate and estrange themselves from others.

Depression: Dr. Ivan's Depression Central

McMan's Depression and Bipolar site

Personality Disorders

Note: While many normal people will find characteristics of personality disorders in their own personality or those of friends and relatives and then jump to the conclusion that they suffer from the disorder, the difference between a personality disorder and the personality of a normal person is "that it does not affect most people's daily functioning to the same degree it might someone diagnosed with one of these disorders."

There is a condition that is named in a tongue in cheek way: "Medical Student's Disease". That is a disease where you read a list of symptoms and conclude that you and most of the people that you know are suffering from the ailment described!

Borderline Personality Disorder

Excellent book: Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care about Has Borderline Personality Disorder by Randi Kreger and Paul T. Mason, 1998.

The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder: New Tools and Techniques to Stop Walking on Eggshells by Randi Kreger, Paperback. Hazelden 2008. ISBN-10: 1592853633 ISBN-13: 978-1592853632. Randi Kreger is co-author with Paul T. Mason, M.S. of Stop Walking on Eggshells published in 1998.

Borderline Personality Disorder

BPD Central. Randi Kreger's, author of "Stop Walking on Eggshells", site. Description from the site: a list of resources for people who care about someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Site includes "Welcome to Oz", an online community for those who are in or have been in relationships with sufferers of BPD.

NY Times Consults Blog, June 15, 2009 "An Expert Look at Borderline Personality Disorder", Personal Health columnist Jane E. Brody discusses borderline personality disorder, a surprisingly common mood disorder that has profound ramifications not just for patients but for family and friends as well. One recovered patient describes it as “a serious psychiatric disorder involving a pervasive sense of emptiness, impulsivity, difficulty with emotions, transient stress-induced psychosis and frequent suicidal thoughts or attempts.”

NY Times Consults Blog, June 19, 2009 "Expert Answers on Borderline Personality Disorder". From the Consults blog: "Recently, readers asked about borderline personality disorder on the Consults blog. Marsha Linehan, professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the developer of dialectical behavior therapy, a technique to treat the disorder, responds." The response section that follows these NY Times articles is as interesting as the articles. Highly recommended reading on the subject. Responders include family members of those who have BPD, mental health professionals, and authors (like Randi Kreger) of books on the subject.

Tom Aplomb: a blog by a writer who writes about many topics. Included in his writings are posts about his thoughts on and experience of having been married to a woman who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder. A different take on the subject than the NY Times articles and one that you may find interesting.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Narcissistic Personality Disorder has some similar elements to Borderline Personality Disorder in the person's self centered approach to relationships. To make things particularly confusing, often those with NPD (or BPD) accuse others with whom they have relationships of suffering from NPD. This is called projection where someone attributes characteristics of themselves to other people. It is also called crazymaking. That is an unscientific term, in case you were wondering.

People with NPD tend to be very difficult to have a relationship with and they tend to cut people off who express any criticism of them. They don't do well in therapy for this and other reasons. They have difficulty admitting imperfection and would see that suffering from NPD would be an imperfection. This means that they are in a Catch-22 situation where they hate to admit imperfection, especially an ailment that affects the mind, and NPD is an ailment that affects the mind. They are caught in between a rock and a hard place where it comes to admitting imperfection.

From the website of the Appalachian State University, click here for a link to a page with links to several web pages on the topic of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. The pages include a discussion of what is normal and what is pathological narcissism. There is a paragraph at the bottom of the main page that states that the pages are a result of a project undertaken for a class at the Appalachian State University, fall semester 2001, and that they were compiled by Melissa E. Barth, a Master's degree candidate in the Department of Human Development and Psychological Counseling.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) : "How to recognize a narcissist" by Joanna M Ashmun, 1998. Very interesting reading on NPD. Also has links to other useful sites and information on NPD.

From Psychology Today on Narcissistic Personality Disorder

For more on Personality Disorders, click on this link to Psych Central and scroll down in the page.

Schizophrenia

Schizophrenia: A devastating mental illness which can often be treated successfully with medication. But then sometimes the person won't take their medication.

Cults & Stockholm Syndrome

Some estrangements begin due to differences in religious beliefs and due to involvement in cults. The process of a person aligning themselves with a different group can be due to true interest in a new set of beliefs or it can be a more insidious process that results from someone setting themselves up as a dominating authority figure over others.

Some people are more susceptible to this kind of influence than others. There are various explanations given for the resulting estrangements. The Stockholm Syndrome and Parental Alienation Syndrome are two.

The Battle for Your Mind Dick Sutphen's The Battle for Your Mind. An essay on brainwashing in our culture & cults - sometimes involved in estrangements. The Stockholm Syndrome is mentioned. I have found articles on the Stockholm Syndrome that interest me in that the Stockholm Syndrome sounds a lot like what occurs in Parental Alienation Syndrome where an inexplicable estrangement can develop despite a previously healthy harmonious relationship.

The Anatomy of Illusion by Pete Evans, The Door Magazine 2004. An interview with Rick Ross, head of the nonprofit The Rick A. Ross Institute for the Study of Destructive Cults, Controversial Groups, and Movements.

The Rick A. Ross Institute. Mission Statement: The Rick A. Ross Institute (RRI) of New Jersey is a nonprofit, tax-exempt 501(c)(3) organization devoted to public education and research. RRI's mission is to study destructive cults, controversial groups and movements and to provide a broad range of information and services easily accessible to the public for assistance and educational purposes.

The Foster Report on Scientology (scroll down on the linked page for references to Scientology being implicated in family estrangements.)

Steven Alan's Freedom of Mind Center, Cult Counselor and Mind control Expert

Parental Alienation Syndrome

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) refers to a type of alienation that may occur between children and one parent after a divorce, particularly after a bitter divorce.

Links to PAS information Divorceinfo.com

Parental Alienation: An information article on Wikipedia. ("Parental Alienation" differs from "Parental Alienation Syndrome" but is related.)

Names are arranged alphabetically by last name. This collection of names of people who have experienced family estrangement include both famous people and some who have had just a brush with fame or infamy due to something that they did or something that someone in their family did.

Jennifer Aniston, actress on Friends, TV program. Was estranged from her mother, Nancy Aniston, after Nancy gave an interview to Hard Copy.

On Amazon.com: Nancy Aniston's book: From Mother and Daughter to Friends: A Memoir

On Softpedia.com: October 2005 Jennifer Aniston Made Peace With Her Mother.

Ruthann Aron

Successful wealthy politically ambitious woman who was charged with plotting to have her husband and an attorney who had testified against her in a court case killed. She was estranged from her father, a younger brother, and a once close college roommate. The Mystery of Ruthann Aron By Karl Vick, Washington Post Staff Writer, Sunday, February 15, 1998.

Roseanne Barr

Comedienne, actress, writer, was estranged from her parents whom she accused of abusing her as a child. She has been mentioned in several articles about repressed memories and the controversy surrounding memories of abuse that come up during therapy. In the biography on imdb.com it is reported that she ended the estrangement from her parents and siblings in 2004 and returned to using the name of Roseanne Barr.

"Childhood Memories? (Or the Power of Suggestion"?)

The Reality of Repressed Memories by Elizabeth F. Loftus in American Psychologist 1993, 48, 518-537, Copyright 1993, American Psychological Association

Biography for Roseanne on imdb.com

God and Man in Beverly Hills (Unfortunately the online article is now gone.) by Evgenia Peretz on VanityFair.com. Interesting article on the Kabbalah movement and its possible influence on the lives and decisions of several celebrities including Roseanne.

Drew Barrymore,

Actress, was estranged from her mother, Jaid Barrymore, for 10 years, an estrangement that ended around the time that Drew was in the movie Riding in Cars with Boys.

She had also been estranged at times from her father, John Drew Barrymore, son of acting legend John Barrymore. Drew's father died on Nov. 29, 2004. The link to his Dec. 1, 2004 obituary (which includes some interesting statements by Drew about her father) in the Washington Post.

Salon People | The purse of the Barrymores

Kim Basinger.

Her feelings about her mother are mentioned in the online article that is very hard on mothers.

Halle Berry: On anecdote.com. Estranged from her father.

Harvey Brown.

His brother, Steven Brown, filed a civil suit in 1999 for the wrongful death of his parents against Harvey Brown. Their parents were murdered in 1997. Harvey Brown had been estranged from his father and was suspected of being involved in their deaths. The police had not had sufficient evidence to bring charges. The brothers are estranged from each other.

New York Magazine article in 2000 about the Brown murder case

Juanita Castro, estranged from her brother, Fidel Castro, since 1963.

On CNN: August 3, 2006. Sister says Castro getting better.

On Cubanet.org: Nov. 24, 1998: "Castro's Sister May Write a Book." by Patricia Maldonado, Associated Press.

On fiu.net: Nov. 27, 1997: "Castro's Sister Pays Respect to Exile Leader", Reuters article.

Pat Conroy, author, estranged from his daughter Susannah Ansley Conroy.

From a Nov. 6, 2010 NPR article about his memoir, My Reading Life:

"As a child, Conroy read literature to escape his family; today, he writes literature to understand and reconnect with them. His memoir My Reading Life is dedicated to his "lost" daughter, Susannah Ansley Conroy.  It reads:
'Know this: I love you with my heart and always will. Your return to my life would be one of the happiest moments I could imagine.'
Conroy divorced Susannah's mother in 1995, when Susannah was barely a teenager. He has hardly seen her since.
'She has a perfect right not to see me," Conroy says. "She's 28 now. But I thought this [dedication] was going to be a last cry of the heart. I would at least try to get her attention and see if I could get her to come back. It has been one of the most soul-killing things to ever happen to me.' "

Tom Cruise: "Dad Abused Me" Yahoo News, April 5, 2006 (Link removed as it is no longer active.)

Christopher "Kit" Culkin: Bio on imdb

Father of Macauley Culkin. Estranged from his children.

Mike Danton, hockey player, estranged from his family & charged with plotting to hire a hit man. An article by Kevin Allen of USA Today tells Danton's tale of woe.

"Family Blames Agent for Estrangement" by Kevin Allen, USA Today, April 22, 2004
Hockey player Mike Danton charged with plotting to hire a hit man to kill an acquaintance who is alleged to be Danton's agent.

Rudolf and Adi Dassler, estranged brothers who founded separate sportsware companies: Puma and Adidas.

May 20, 2006 article from Mirror.Co.UK: DRIBBLING RIVALRY: EXCLUSIVE HOW BROTHERS' BITTER FEUD LAUNCHED WORLD CUP'S RIVAL FOOTBALL BOOT GIANTS By Nick Webster

Bette Davis: Estranged from her daughter, B.D. Hyman. Responded to B.D.'s writings in "This 'N That" in 1987.

On Wikipedia: Bette Davis

B.D. Hyman, daughter of Bette Davis, estranged from her mother after B.D. wrote her first book, My Mother's Keeper.The link is about B.D. Hyman's 2nd Book, Narrow is the Way.

B.D. Hyman Ministry B.D. Hyman's website for her ministry.

Stardust: The Bette Davis Story, a 2006 TV documentary. Available on Amazon on DVD.

Miles Davis: Estranged from two sons, Gregory Davis and Miles Davis, Jr.

Dark Magus: The Jekyll & Hyde Life Of Miles Davis by Gregory Davis, reviewed in "Sketches in Pain" by Rob Harvilla in the Village Voice online, Nov. 27, 2006.

Patti Davis estranged from her parents after publication of her novel: A House of Secrets. Reconciled in 1993.:

The American Experience, PBS "The Reagan Children" written by Julie Wolf.

Bill de Blasio, 109th Mayor of New York City. He was estranged from his father who was an alcoholic. His name at birth was Warren Wilhelm, Jr. In 1983 he changed his name to Warren de Blasio-Wilhelm. In 2002 he changed his name to Bill de Blasio.

On Wikipedia: Bill de Blasio

Tom DeLay. House Majority Leader.

Estranged from his mother, two brothers, and sister. The link is to a copy of an article titled "Absolute Truth" by Peter Perl that appeared in the Washington Post on May 13, 2001.

"Absolute Truth" by Peter Perl, May 13, 2001 (Link removed as it no longer goes to article.)

Gerard Depardieu estranged from his son, Guillaume.

"At the moment, we have no ties. I cut things off because I no longer want to be the wall, or the trash bin where one dumps anything one wants," the 54-year-old Depardieu said, calling his son "very difficult, incorrigible."

BBC Depardieu article

Gerard and his son reconciled but in 2008 his son died of pneumonia. The following link is to an article in The Independent.

Oct. 14, 2008 Gérard Depardieu's son dies of pneumonia at 37

Joe Dimaggio

Joe Dimaggio and his son, Joe Dimaggio, Jr. were said to be estranged for many years as the time of Joe Sr.'s death.

Richard Ben Cramer chats about his book, 'Joe DiMaggio: The Hero's Life' October 25, 2000 on cnn.com

From the Cramer interview: Richard Ben Cramer: "Joe was estranged from almost all his family. He didin't speak for years with his older brother Vince (also an outfielder, in the National League), and he similarly froze out Dominic, his youngest brother, who played center field for the Red Sox. Joe was also estranged from his only child, Joe DiMaggio, Jr., who in fact drifted, homeless and addicted, into a wanderer's life. While the old man was making a quarter-million dollars per weekend, signing baseballs, Junior was living in a dumpster in California."

Joe Dimaggio, Jr., Article about the relationship between son and father on the PBS site.

Eminem: estranged from his mother and other relatives.

Everything Eminem

On Salon.com: Eminem's Dirty Secrets

Sydney Ethridge, a man who was known in the San Diego area for his activism against the use of lethal force by police during arrests.

Ethridge was estranged from his father for years, an estrangement that was resolved with the assistance of a TV talk show host, Larry Elder, who brought them together again. After appearing on The Larry Elder show, Ethridge and his two sisters went to their father's home. After speaking with his father for hours Ethridge died that same night in his sleep at his father's home. The story is told by San Diego Union-Tribune Staff Reporter David E. Graham: "An estrangement, and a life, end: TV talk show got father, son together". Oct. 6, 2004

"This show really struck a chord with me because I had a similar experience with my own father," Elder said. "He and I literally did not speak for almost 10 years. We reconciled years ago, and now we're the best of friends."

Mia Farrow, estranged from adopted daughter Soon-Yi.

On The Independent: June 2, 2006, "My Faith Helps Me Through Hard Times" (Link stopped working so removed.)

Mark Felt, of "Deep Throat" fame. Estranged from and later reconciled with his daughter.

Online USA Today article: Deep Inside Deep Throat

Alina Fernandez, estranged from her father, Fidel Castro.

On Wolfman Productions: Castro's Daughter, Alina Fernandez

On Amazon: Castro's Daughter: An Exile's Memoir of Cuba by Alina Fernandez Revuelta

Prince Fielder, baseball player, estranged from his father, Cecil Fielder, baseball player.

Jodie Foster (1962-), actress. Estranged from her brother, Lucius Fisher "Buddy" Foster.

Jodie Foster on Wikipedia

Foster Child: A Biography of Jodie Foster, a book written by Buddy Foster. Published in 1997.

Adam Yahiye Gadahn: American born in 1978 with family in California. Estranged from his family and involved with Islamists who are virulently anti-American. He appears in anti-American videos that are broadcast around the world by the media. He is being sought by the FBI.

FBI site on Adam Gadahn

Adam Gadahn Fast Facts on CNN

All About Adam Gadahn by Michelle Malkin

On Wikipedia

Edward Gingerich. In 1993 he became famous for being the first Amishman in history convicted of homicide. He killed his wife. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia. In April 2007 he allegedly kidnapped his estranged teenaged daughter who had been living with her grandparents for the past 14 years.

Report releases details of Gingerich disappearance, April 20, 2007, The Meadville Tribune

Gingerich charged after missing daughter found, April 22, 2007, The Meadville Tribune

Rudolph Giuliani, former Mayor of NYC and running for U.S. president, is estranged from his son and daughter who have no plans to assist him in his campaign.

Giuliani Estranged from His 2 Children. March 5, 2007. CBS news article. From the article: "Giuliani's 21-year-old son, Andrew, told The New York Times that he would be too busy working on his golf game to participate in his father's presidential campaign."

"Giuliani's Blended Family" by Randal D. Archibald on the The Caucus, Political Blogging from the NY Times, March 5, 2007. The response comments are interesting too.

David Hale and Milas Hale II, brothers:

"Brother on brother" by Murray Waas
From Salon.com: "Whitewater witness David Hale attempted to suborn perjury by his own brother by asking him to falsely corroborate illegal acts by President Clinton." Also quoting from the Salon.com article: "Six people close to the Hale brothers confirmed that they had become estranged from each other in 1993, when David allegedly pressured Milas to lie. Three of those people said that the estrangement was directly related to Milas' refusal to do anything improper to assist David in his effort to avoid accountability for his Whitewater crimes."

"The mark of Cain: a tale of two brothers" by Murray Waas.

Justine Henin, tennis player. She had been estranged from her family but has reconciled.

Heart on her sleeve, June 12, 2007, by Stephanie Myles, The Gazette.

Henin shares victory with family, June 10. 2007 article by the NY Times News Service, Paris, on the Taipei Times.

Justine Henin Interview, June 10, 2007 on tennis-x.com

"Wimbledon the missing peace in a tumultous life story" Interview by Donald McRae in The Guardian, June 20, 2006.

John H. Holliday, D.D.S., better known as Doc Holliday. Estranged from his father.

Found the Doc Holliday estrangement reference online in the description of his biography: Doc Holliday: A Family Portrait by Karen Holliday Tanner.

Sir Anthony Hopkins, actor. Estranged from his daughter, Abigail Hopkins, singer, songwriter, and actress.

"I hardly ever hear from her," he said. "She probably has good reasons. I guess we are estranged. I hope she is well. She is too busy and has to do her own thing. I think she is in England somewhere. Life is life. You get on with it."
From online article/interview (April 14, 2006)with Abigail Hopkins: Her Dark Materials by Olga Craig on Telegraph.co.uk. (Link no longer working so link has been removed.)

Actress Angelina Jolie estranged from and now reconciled with her father, actor Jon Voight.

2002: Jolie estranged from actor father.

February 2010: Reunited: Angelina Jolie mends her eight year rift with father Jon Voight after Brad Pitt plays peacemaker

David & Ted Kaczynski

Brothers, David & Ted Kaczynski, Unabomber, are estranged. The relationship between Ted and his family had already been strained and distant prior to the discovery that Ted was the Unabomber. After David turned his brother in, Ted became even more estranged from his brother and his mother.

Brother of Unabomber, Ted Kaczynski: How I Dealt With His Guilt

Ted Kaczynski Biography, Also known as the Unabomber

Alicia Keys mends fragile relationship with estranged father. Direct link for article no longer works and searches for the article bring up pages that provide endless popup ads which is irritating. The nice thing about libraries is that they don't usually lose the books. The internet loses links!

Norma Khouri, author of Forbidden Love, a book that was supposed to be the true story of the murder of her friend, Dalia, the victim in an "honor killing" in Jordan.

Norma claimed that she had grown up in Jordan and Dalia had been her longtime childhood friend and business partner. In the summer of 2004 the book was exposed as a hoax after a newspaper did an investigation of the facts in the book.

Norma Khouri turned out to be an American citizen who grew up in Chicago where she was at the time of the incidents detailed in the book. She is estranged from her mother, Asma Bagain, who hasn't seen her since 2000 when Norma and her husband, John Toliopolous disappeared. The book, Forbidden Love, was particularly popular in Australia where Khouri had been given refuge when she was thought to be in need of protection due to her knowledge of the alleged murder. There has been no evidence that Dalia or Dalia's family ever existed.

NY Times article: Norma Khouri & other literary hoaxes in Australia

Jamaica Kincaid, writer. This article by Jamaica Kincaid about her decision to estrange herself from her mother appeared in the AARP magazine.

April 11, 2008 From AARP, The Magazine: The Estrangement

Esther Lederer - who was better known as Ann Landers. She was estranged for decades from her twin sister Pauline Phillips of Dear Abby fame.

The twin sister advice columnists, Ann Landers (Esther Lederer) and Dear Abby (Pauline Phillips), were estranged for decades. The estrangement was said to be resolved prior to the death of Esther (Eppie) Lederer in 2002. But all did not appear to be well between their daughters, Margo Howard and Jeanne Phillips at that time as reported in the 2002 CBS News article linked below.

On CBSNews.com, "Advice Columnists, Heal Thyselves" CHICAGO, June 27, 2002

"Dear Ann" By Carol Felsenthal, February 2003 issue of Chicago. Long interesting article about Eppie Lederer's life

Advice columnist 'Dear Abby" dies at age 94. January 17, 2013, AP article

Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin.

The celebrated comedian, actor, and telethon fundraiser for Muscular Dystrophy, has written a book on his relationship and estrangement with straight man, actor, and singer Dean Martin. Dean and Me: (A Love Story) by Jerry Lewis

Lindsay Lohan: Estranged from her father. Recently there have been reports that they are reconciled. But that could change.

Estrangement from dad partially to blame for problems, Feb. 9, 2008

Actress Lindsay Lohan reunited with estranged dad, Sept. 11, 2007

Lohan's New Warning to Dad, NY Post, March 28, 2007

Hell Hath No Fury Like a Showbiz Father Scorned, Michael Lohan’s lament By Greg Williams on nymag.com

Courtney Love. Estranged from her father, Hank Harrison, her mother, Linda Carrol, and her daughter, Frances.

Estranged from her daughter Courtney Love, Linda Carroll went on a journey to find her own mother and wrote a book: Her Mother's Daughter: A Memoir of the Mother I Never Knew and of My Daughter, Courtney Love

Her Mother's Daughter, the website about the book, Her Mother's Daughter by Linda Carroll, Courtney's mother.

August 2010: Courtney sends birthday message to daughter.

Jenna MacFarlane: Estranged by her family, Jenna advertises in the newspaper for a new family and finds one! She has set up a website for people who want to find new families.

On ABC News, January 22, 2007

In Glamour Magazine, February 2007

Jenna's former website: www.familywanted.com (website no longer exists)

Jena Malone (Click on the second link for Demi Moore for some information about Jena Malone and her mother.)

Manganaro: The brothers Salvatore and James Dell'Orto each own a restaurant bearing the name Manganaro on Ninth Ave. in New York City. The restaurants are next to each other. In online accounts of their estrangement and court battles it is reported that they have not spoken to each other in over 25 years.

The dispute was apparently over the use of the family name Manganaro and the name "Hero Boy" for advertising purposes. After learning of the estranged brothers several years ago, I was in NYC and discovered the restaurants. I had lunch in Manganaro's Gourmet Foods and intend to try Manganaro's Hero Boy in the future. Lunch was great! I spoke to the owner to let him know that I enjoyed his restaurant but didn't tell him what brought me to his restaurant.

Links to the websites of each restaurant are accessed by clicking on the respective images below. The statement of nonaffiliation is from the menu of Manganaro's Foods which is at 488 9th Ave. The statement was also posted on a sign outside by the sidewalk and on signs in several places in the restaurant.

Manganaro Foods

On the menu was printed:

Manganaro's Gourmet Foods

Manganoro's Hero BoyThe front of Manganaro's Heroboy at 492 9th Ave. Click image to go to their website.

Online articles about the two restaurants:

Manganaro's Gourmet Foods, 488 9th Ave., NYC

Manganaro's Hero Boy, 492 9th Ave., NYC

Jester's Courtroom: Oh Brother! (Source: The New York Times September 27, 2002) (Scroll down in list of articles till you get to "Oh Brother".)

Tommy Martin, football all-star. Estranged from parents, adopted by aunt and uncle. Then estranged from them but reconciled years later.

"Football's Tommy Martin Completes long trek"

Rona Maynard and Joyce Maynard, sisters and writers who had stopped speaking for several years. Their estrangement ended and their relationship has blossomed. Online articles giving each sister's perspective on their relationship are on their websites.

Rona Maynard's website: ronamaynard.com

Joyce Maynard's website: joycemaynard.com

Rona Maynard's book, My Mother's Daughter: A Memoir which was published in September 2007.

Boxers Floyd Mayweather, Jr. and Sr., son and and father, were reported to have reconciled after an estrangement of several years and Floyd, Sr. was training Floyd, Jr. but then Jr. replaced Sr. as trainer with Sr.'s estranged brother, Roger. So it's unclear whether the reconciliation has held or not.

Portrait of the artist as a brilliant brat by D. Allan Kerr on Seacoastonline.com, Dec. 14, 2007

Only Floyd Mayweather, Sr. loses on May 5, 2007 by Ralph Rimpell on hotboxingnews.com

James McAvoy, actor, estranged from his father whose name is also James McAvoy.

James McAvoy's father begs for atonement from his estranged son, Sept. 1, 2007

Stefan and Christine Molyneux, husband and wife, both said to be estranged from their parents. Stefan has also estranged his brother. Stefan has a website, FreeDomainRadio, on which he makes available discussion forums on a variety of topics, podcasts, and books.

Much of what Molyneux offers online is free but he also sells subscriptions at various prices and accepts donations. His output is prodigious with hundreds of YouTube videos (user name stefbot), over 1,000 podcasts, seven books, frequent participation in his discussion forums.

He has been blamed for a number of family estrangements initiated by followers of his writings and podcasts. In late 2008 Molyneux received a lot of publicity in the media in England over the story of a young man named Tom who estranged himself from his family after participating in discussions on FreeRadioDomain.com.

  1. Family and Friends of FDR-ers on Liberating Minds

  2. FDR Liberated: A continuing analysis of the FreeDomainRadio Community

  3. Liberating Minds Forum Discussion of FreeDomainRadio on the LiberatingMinds website.

  4. FreeDomainRadio, Stefan Molyneux's site

  5. FreeDomain: The Logic of Personal and Political Freedom - The FreeDomain blog

  6. 'Website Led Teen to Quit Family' by Robin Powell, Sky News Online, Dec. 29, 2008

  7. "A fearful mother reveals: the internet cult that stole my son" Dec. 12, 2008 by Kate Hilpern, The Daily Mail

  8. Like a moth to a flame, Nov. 18, 2008

  9. FDR at Sky News - video and print coverage, Dec. 30, 2008

  10. My brief experience with Stefan (in four parts), Dec. 28, 2008 (The experience of a participant in FDR who calls himself Dash. Scroll down in the page to where Part 1 begins.)

  11. Stefan Molyneux Revealed: A blog

Heidi Montag, reality TV star, estranged for 9 months from her mother as of late 2010.

On Radar, Dec. 2010: Open Letter To Heidi Montag From Her Estranged Mom: 'It's Time For Us To Heal'

Daily Mail Article, June 14, 2012: Genuine love or fame hungry? Heidi Montag reunites with estranged mother . . .

About Heidi Montag on Wikipedia.

Demi Moore. Estranged from her mother but reconciled prior to her mother's death.

Online article by Kat Giantis about several mother daughter relationships that include either temporary or permanent estrangements. Includes reference to Virginia Guynes, Demi Moore's mother, but also talks about several other mothers who were less than stellar.

Melba Moore Actress and singer estranged from her daughter.

Madalyn Murray O'Hair, estranged from son William, an evangelist.

Will was estranged also from his brother, John Garth, and his daughter, Robin. The disappearance in the summer of 1995 of Madalyn Murray, her son, John Garth Murray, and her granddaughter, Robin Murray O'Hair, became the subject of much speculation about their fate. Their bodies were found in 2001. All had been murdered.

On Crime Magazine: The Murder of Madalyn Murray O'Hair: America's Most Hated Woman by Lona Manning

On Wikipedia: Madalyn Murray O'Hair

On Who2: Madalyn Murray O'Hair

Ryan O'Neal estranged from daughter, Tatum O'Neal for 25 years. They reconciled and are appearing together in a reality show called The O'Neals that ran on the Oprah Winfrey network in the winter of 2011. This was quite a fascinating reality show that did not appear to result in a lasting reconciliation. Their estrangement seems to be continuing.

Dec. 31, 2010: Ryan O'Neal and daughter Tatum's beach walk as they rebuild relationship in new reality show.

Found: A Daughter's Journey Home, by Tatum O'Neal came out at the end of the reality show. I suspect that she may have seen the show as an excellent opportunity to get publicity for her book.

Sharon Osbourne. Estranged from her father, Don Arden, for twenty years after she took over the career of Ozzie Osbourne. Reconciled with her father in 2002. He died in July 2007.

Daily Mail article, July 2007: Why Sharon Osbourne's dad was the most feared man in music.

Linda Owens and Rebecca Owens.

Rebecca has estranged herself from her mother, Linda, after learning as an adult that Tookie Williams was the man who murdered her father when she was 8 years old. She had thought that her father's murderer had been put to death years ago. She hadn't known his identity until 2001. Linda acknowledges that it was a mistake not to tell her daughters the truth about their father's murder from the beginning.

Fred Waldron Phelps Sr.

A repellent individual who estranged himself from his father and sister due to his religious objections to his father marrying a divorcee. In later life Phelps was estranged by several of his thirteen children. Phelps, a preacher, goes to military funerals and other gatherings where he carries signs that denigrate homosexuals. He hates Finns and Swedes among many others.

Pauline Phillips, advice columnist and twin sister of Esther Lederer who also wrote an advice column. See the entry above for Esther Lederer for information and links.

Eric Roberts: Estranged for years from his sister, actress Julia Roberts, and his daughter, actress Emma Roberts, and his mother. He reported reconciling with his sister in 2004. I have no information on whether he reconciled with his mother or daughter.

On Answers.com: Eric Roberts

On Wikipedia.com: Eric Roberts

On imdb.com: Eric Roberts' lengthy filmography & bio.

Julia Roberts was estranged from her older brother, Eric. The estrangement was reported to have ended in 2004.

On Wikipedia: Julia Roberts

Meg Ryan has been estranged from her mother, Susan Ryan Jordan, who has written a book: The Immune Spirit: A Story of Love, Loss and Healing; One Woman's Triumph over Breast Cancer, from the Mother of Meg Ryan The book is about the estrangement but also about her recovery from breast cancer.

Laura Schlesinger, radio talk show host, estranged from her mother, Yolanda Schlesinger, who was found dead in her own home in late 2002. She had been dead for some time before she was found.

The Smoking Gun Archive

Dr. Laura's website

Deathwatch information on Yolanda Schlesinger

Dr. Laura on Family Estrangements, April 1, 2003

General Daniel E. SicklesGeneral Daniel E. Sickles, a Civil War Veteran who had been at Gettysburg.

A New York Times article of May 4, 1914 refers to a 29 year estrangement with his son, Stanton, that was resolved in 1914 at the time of his death. (Long after I found this link and included it here, I discovered that a book had been written about Sickles. The book's title is American Scoundrel: The Life of the Notorious Civil War General Dan Sickles by Thomas Keneally.) NY Times article link.

Anna Nicole Smith. Was estranged from both of her parents, a sister, an aunt and uncle. Mentions of the estrangements were found in the following articles.

SFGate.com, Nov.2005: Anna Nicole Smith Photos to Jeopardize Court Battle

Donna Hogan, half-sister to Anna Nicole Smith, tells all on CBS News.

Muriel Sparks, author of The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie, died at 88 in April 2006. She was estranged from her sculptor/painter son, Robin.

Britney Spears, estranged from her mother, Lynne Spears reported in June 2007. A reconciliation was reported in October 2007.

Sister stands by Britney Spears, Oct. 10, 2007. The Daily Telegraph.

Britney Spears Family Snub, on Monsters & Critics, July 2, 2007

Britney Spears Official Website

Britney Spears Confusing Messages to Mom, Love Her or Hate Her? June 26, 2007, on The National Ledger

Britney Spears Reunites with Her Mom Lynne, October 2007: People.com article

Phil Spector, estranged from adopted son, Louis Spector.

Tori Spelling, estranged from father, Aaron Spelling, now deceased, from her mother, Candy, and also from ex-husband, Charlie Shanian. Was reported to be reconciling with her mother, Candy, in the spring of 2007 but things didn't work out and they were reported to be estranged in 2009. But late in 2009 they were reported to be reconciled again and, so far, they seem to be remaining reconciled.

March 30, 2007: Candy Spelling "Reconciling with Tori 'Feels Great!'" by Courtney Rubin and Scott Huber

On TMZ: July 26, 2006: Tori to Mom - You Cheaped Out My Wedding

Candy & Tori Spelling Reconcile, Dec. 2009 on Huffington Post.

Jelaila Starr, psychic counselor. Article on a Family Reunion and her suggestions for how to make it work.

Alice Walker, author of The Color Purple, estranged from her daughter, writer and feminist Rebecca Walker. Alice Walker was also estranged from her father.

Taking Care of the Truth: Embedded Slander: A Meditation on the Complicity of Wikipedia - Alice Walker on attempting to correct the misinformation about her on Wikipedia, particularly misinformation about the estrangement of her by her daughter.

Also, on the Poetry Page of Estrangements.com is a link to a poem by Alice Walker: "Despair is the Ground Bounced Back From" which is from her book of poetry: The World Will Follow Joy: Turning Madness into Flowers (New Poems)published by The New Press, First Edition edition (April 2, 2013).

Alice Walker: The Official Website

Evolution of a Feminist Daughter By Stephanie Rosenbloom, NY Times March 18, 2007

Tell Me Less: "Rebecca Walker and Anne Lamott don't get that some thoughts are best kept private." By Jessica Hopper, March 30, 2007, Chicago Reader. From article: ""Oddly enough, Walker's pregnancy observations aren't nearly as embarassing as the way she unpacks her relationship with her own mother, writer Alice Walker. Without a hint of tact, she hangs their dirty laundry out for all to see."

Rebecca Walker, Measuring Out A Mother's Love By Teresa Wiltz, Washington Post Staff Writer, Friday, March 30, 2007; Page C04

Interview with Rebecca Walker: "Can I survive having a baby? Will I lose myself ... ?" By Sharon Krum, Saturday May 26, 2007, The Guardian. From the article: "In an email, Rebecca asked Alice to apologise for what she felt was years of hurt; Rebecca says Alice refused and claimed she was no longer interested in the job of mother. Today they are estranged;"

Alice Walker Talks About Feminism, But Not About Motherhood, Daily Intel, May 23, 2007

Rebecca Walker's Website

On Amazon: Baby Love by Rebecca Walker.

On Amazon: Black, White & Jewish: Autobiography of a Shifting Self by Rebecca Walker

Karma Wilson's Story:

An article that was online but now the website where the article was found exists no more unfortunately. I hate to remove the mention of the article which was: "Karma Wilson: A Story of Resolution" written by a woman who reestablished contact with her mother and, subsequently, her grandmother through the internet after a 10 year estrangement. A story that gives hope for resolution.